Mother’s Day – From ‘Boohoo’ to ‘Buyhoo’

Wake up this morning to the sound of two grown-up men serenading their mother. Rush to figure out where this is coming from, and realize it is DD National on TV, which is playing Bollywood numbers dedicated to “ma” on Mother’s Day.

The ongoing number talks about how pointless it is to look for God, since ‘he’ (she?) is unlikely to look very different from ‘ma’. Two decidedly middle-aged sons, in a boat, with their mother…telling her she is ‘God’.

(At this point, special effects play to indicate a dream sequence.) I’m the woman in the boat, with two grown-up sons telling me I’m God. I smile. For a tiny second, I feel powerful, and then I gnash my teeth, and scream: “You scoundrels! You think I enjoy being this blasted wish-fulfillment tree that you guys have turned me into, all your miserable lives? Now, get off my back, for heaven’s sake, and let me live the rest of my life as a human being.”

(Special effects) – I’m back on my couch…until the next song starts – this time, it’s an adolescent boy singing to his mother, while his sister hovers in the background, maintaining a diplomatic silence.

“How sweet you are, how good you are, how lovable you are…’ and on and on. Even as an ego-boost, that’s pretty lame. If you’re a mother, there’s only one question these words can trigger: “Cut out the BS…what do you want?”   

The next number knocks me over completely. It has a little girl standing on a stage and singing, “I’ve seen mother, but I haven’t seen mother’s love.”

“How sad for you missy! Maybe you didn’t look in the right place. Or perhaps, like the eight-armed mother in the instant breakfast ad, the poor hapless woman is just too busy running around all day to let all the ‘love’ hang out.

By now, I’ve had enough. So, I turn off the TV, and pick up the newspaper. Only to be greeted by Mother’s Day ads – get her this, get her that – the front page, the page after that, and the one after that. They’re all just teeming with ads – about what sons and daughters should be buying for their mothers. I smile. This is a world I’m comfortable in. No airy-fairy mother-worship here…if you want to be all theatrical on one hand-picked day of the year, and declare your love for your mother, get her STUFF… a little materialism never hurts anybody, does it?  Especially, mothers….!!!